NEOK'S PROFILE

author=kentona

author=supremewarrior
I feel the same actually, I can't really find anyone who I can relate to.

I'm interested in your stories!

to make a long story short, my self-esteem is closely tied with my performance in any given area in my life. This makes me fear failure so much that rarely take risks or attempt new things (even innocuous things like RMVX). I also avoid confrontation to a fault.

This is not a good thing.

(...the problem is even now I can still excel if I apply myself. I just rarely ever want to apply myself anymore. It is exhausting and mentally draining for me.)


For some crib notes:
-I had the highest average in my school from grade 7 thru 12 (the average grade size was about 100-150 students)
-I was MVP of the senior boys volleyball team for grades 11 and 12, and the only rookie in the starting 6 for grade 10, even though I am only 5'10" (on a good day)
-I was often the leading scorer on my hockey teams (or near the top)
-I went to provincials for track & field every year
-I swept the city track meet in grade 7 actually, getting 1st in all 5 events I participated in
-I played goalie in soccer in the one year I competed in it (except for the final game of the year, where I played midfielder. I scored 3 goals.)
-I still remember my PBs from track & field (12.57m in shotput, 6.20m in long jump, 11.53s in 100m, 7.87 in 60m, 24.23s in 200m, 54.5s in 400m)
-in my aptitude test in school I was ranked in the 99th percentile for nearly all categories
-I loafed through university with a 90% average, graduating with Great Distinction
-I made the most downloaded game on RMN.

..and yet I still suck as a human being and often go through bouts of depression.