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WARNING: THIS BOOK CONTAINS COPIOUS AMOUNTS OF MURDER, HEARTACHE, LOVE, ORGASM, PLOT TWISTS AND PUFF, THE MAGIC DRAGON.
Posts
Strangeluv
2787
Strangeluv
View playlists
CloseYeah, so I write in my spare time and just thought I'd share three of my novels with you all. I doubt anyone's going to read any but it's worth a shot. Leave comments!
ME AND TOM UNDER THE BOARDWALK
Synopsis: The protagonist in this novel becomes aware he is in this novel in the first chapter. Realizing this, he undergoes an epiphany to make this novel the best he can make it. But how is he going to do that? You would think you would know these things from reading the back of this novel, wouldn't you? It doesn't help that the protagonist is the narrator and he knows less than you do already about this book. And it doesn't help that the first chapter begins with mutual masturbation and ends with a heinous murder.
WARNING: This book contains copious amounts of murder, heartache, love, orgasm, plot twists and Puff, the Magic Dragon.
Download: http://www.lulu.com/product/file-download/me-and-tom-under-the-boardwalk/10899232
------------
TOGETHER WE ARE SPIDERS
Synopsis: In 2005 Trinidad and Tobago, the kidnapping of a young cyclist affects four different people: a boy who pretends to be Albert Einstein's great grandson who believes a curse has been put on his family; a wayward Muslim girl; a boy haunted by his girlfriend's doppelganger; and a past kidnap victim turned crime-fighter wannabe.
Download: http://www.lulu.com/product/file-download/together-we-are-spiders/11474420
-----------------
LITTLETOWN SECRETS
Synopsis: In Littletown, everyone has a secret. Realizing that they have no one to trust with these secrets, a young boy sets up a small business of "secret keeping": a dime per secret.
It is mostly successful due to the other children. And through these secrets the mystical dangers surrounding the town are revealed, such as the clock tower that houses a ghost, a mischievous imp lurking in the forest and the truth of the tree that gobbles up the birds perched on its branches. And through these secrets reveal childhood dilemmas such as bullies, rowing abusive parents, isolation and peer pressure.
Download: http://www.lulu.com/product/file-download/littletown-secrets/10898284
ME AND TOM UNDER THE BOARDWALK
Synopsis: The protagonist in this novel becomes aware he is in this novel in the first chapter. Realizing this, he undergoes an epiphany to make this novel the best he can make it. But how is he going to do that? You would think you would know these things from reading the back of this novel, wouldn't you? It doesn't help that the protagonist is the narrator and he knows less than you do already about this book. And it doesn't help that the first chapter begins with mutual masturbation and ends with a heinous murder.
WARNING: This book contains copious amounts of murder, heartache, love, orgasm, plot twists and Puff, the Magic Dragon.
Download: http://www.lulu.com/product/file-download/me-and-tom-under-the-boardwalk/10899232
------------
TOGETHER WE ARE SPIDERS
Synopsis: In 2005 Trinidad and Tobago, the kidnapping of a young cyclist affects four different people: a boy who pretends to be Albert Einstein's great grandson who believes a curse has been put on his family; a wayward Muslim girl; a boy haunted by his girlfriend's doppelganger; and a past kidnap victim turned crime-fighter wannabe.
Download: http://www.lulu.com/product/file-download/together-we-are-spiders/11474420
-----------------
LITTLETOWN SECRETS
Synopsis: In Littletown, everyone has a secret. Realizing that they have no one to trust with these secrets, a young boy sets up a small business of "secret keeping": a dime per secret.
It is mostly successful due to the other children. And through these secrets the mystical dangers surrounding the town are revealed, such as the clock tower that houses a ghost, a mischievous imp lurking in the forest and the truth of the tree that gobbles up the birds perched on its branches. And through these secrets reveal childhood dilemmas such as bullies, rowing abusive parents, isolation and peer pressure.
Download: http://www.lulu.com/product/file-download/littletown-secrets/10898284
ariedonus
41
I am in the process of reading Littletown Secrets. So far, I'm diggin' it. The narrative style is particularly interesting. I'll let you know what I think when I get farther in and/or finish it. :D
AznChipmunk
4613
Everybody read Me & Tom Under the Boardwalk. Seriously. It's amazing. I remember when you released it chapter by chapter at first I read it up as fast as I could.
^Same. It's a really good read.
I'll try reading the other two when I've got some spare time - when I read I don't like being interrupted. ^.^
I'll try reading the other two when I've got some spare time - when I read I don't like being interrupted. ^.^
Strangeluv
2787
I know Azn read it when I had it up on GW. I didn't know you did, Liberty! Or did I? Do you remember anything about it to give me any crits/comments?
Either way, thanks a lot for reading. I understand it's really not easy to read an entire novel on your computer screen.
Either way, thanks a lot for reading. I understand it's really not easy to read an entire novel on your computer screen.
Well, I don't think I actually said I was reading it at the time, but I did end up doing so and enjoyed it. It was very different from the usual books I read so it sticks out a bit in my memory. I'd need to re-read it again (which I might do anyway) to give proper feedback, though, since it's been a while.
Koff
1013
oh, i read me & tom a year or two back when i lurked on GW
i am not much of a novel reader but i greatly enjoyed reading this one!
i am not much of a novel reader but i greatly enjoyed reading this one!
Strangeluv
2787
@Liberty: You don't have to, or anything. But I am glad you enjoyed it!
@Koff: Good to see I appealed to a, what can I say, casual reader. Thanks for reading! Wow, makes me wonder how many other people read that book.
@Koff: Good to see I appealed to a, what can I say, casual reader. Thanks for reading! Wow, makes me wonder how many other people read that book.
Strangeluv
2787
Thanks. They're not very complicated or anything and abuse the Photoshop "stroke" tool, but I don't think they came out bad either!
The length of these alone shows dedication, downloaded all three but I won't have any spare time for a couple weeks
Strangeluv
2787
Thanks for the consideration, though! Yeah, I put a lot of months of effort into each of these.
ariedonus
41
I just finished Littletown Secrets. Very good work, my friend.
Overall, I really enjoyed the story. Each secret had a bit of mystery to it (as one might assume, I suppose), even when they all had a very similar format in the way they were told (introduction, problem, overcoming the problem). Littletown itself was nearly a character of its own and I loved how certain areas of the town felt bright and cheery, while others had a gloomy, dark, and ominous feel to them. The variation really spiced things up.
One aspect that was pretty awesome was that, despite that every story is independent of the others, there was a feeling of unity between them. This was likely due to your excellent crafting of Littletown, but the tidbits and comments from the narrator definitely helped too.
Now for some of the more negative points. To me, these are somewhat nitpicky things, but with a pretty polished work like this, that's kind of all you can say sometimes. ;D
I mentioned the format that you use for each chapter earlier, and that was kind of a downer sometimes. While it works very well if you are reading the novella in pieces, it made it hard for me to read it continuously. I ended up reading a chapter every now and again when I have some time to kill, but for those that wanted to read it in heavy sittings, the format used might kill the momentum.
Moving on, I also found some of the dialogue of the children to sometimes be a little unbelievable. This is primarily due to word choice in particular situations, and also due to how well-spoken they are at times. To provide an example from April's dialogue "Things like that you cannot plan." does not quite sound like something you would expect a kid to say. If this is intentional for stylistic or characterization reasons, I get it, although in some cases it seemed to push the boundaries.
Finally, the narration. While I loved it, it was somewhat wordy at points and the style did not always seem consistent. I can't honestly gather a bunch of specifics for this, because I wasn't taking diligent notes as I read this (I wish I did so this could be more constructive). Really, just take this comment with a grain of salt (or whatever the phrase is), as this is mainly based on my feelings overall, without some examples to kind of point it out.
Ultimately, I really liked it. You are a very talented author, and if I get the chance to read some of your other works, I bet I will enjoy them just as much, if not more. I hope my comments were helpful; I would be glad to elaborate wherever necessary, if you want.
Overall, I really enjoyed the story. Each secret had a bit of mystery to it (as one might assume, I suppose), even when they all had a very similar format in the way they were told (introduction, problem, overcoming the problem). Littletown itself was nearly a character of its own and I loved how certain areas of the town felt bright and cheery, while others had a gloomy, dark, and ominous feel to them. The variation really spiced things up.
One aspect that was pretty awesome was that, despite that every story is independent of the others, there was a feeling of unity between them. This was likely due to your excellent crafting of Littletown, but the tidbits and comments from the narrator definitely helped too.
Now for some of the more negative points. To me, these are somewhat nitpicky things, but with a pretty polished work like this, that's kind of all you can say sometimes. ;D
I mentioned the format that you use for each chapter earlier, and that was kind of a downer sometimes. While it works very well if you are reading the novella in pieces, it made it hard for me to read it continuously. I ended up reading a chapter every now and again when I have some time to kill, but for those that wanted to read it in heavy sittings, the format used might kill the momentum.
Moving on, I also found some of the dialogue of the children to sometimes be a little unbelievable. This is primarily due to word choice in particular situations, and also due to how well-spoken they are at times. To provide an example from April's dialogue "Things like that you cannot plan." does not quite sound like something you would expect a kid to say. If this is intentional for stylistic or characterization reasons, I get it, although in some cases it seemed to push the boundaries.
Finally, the narration. While I loved it, it was somewhat wordy at points and the style did not always seem consistent. I can't honestly gather a bunch of specifics for this, because I wasn't taking diligent notes as I read this (I wish I did so this could be more constructive). Really, just take this comment with a grain of salt (or whatever the phrase is), as this is mainly based on my feelings overall, without some examples to kind of point it out.
Ultimately, I really liked it. You are a very talented author, and if I get the chance to read some of your other works, I bet I will enjoy them just as much, if not more. I hope my comments were helpful; I would be glad to elaborate wherever necessary, if you want.
Eike
2708
Oh, I read the first couple of chapters of Me & Tom Under the Boardwalk on gw a while ago as well, I liked them! Will give the full thing a go.
Strangeluv
2787
post=150690
I just read me and tom under the boardwalk, wtf did I just read? XDD
@Nessiah: Did you really read the whole thing? Can you elaborate on your comments? =)
post=150684
I just finished Littletown Secrets. Very good work, my friend.
Overall, I really enjoyed the story. Each secret had a bit of mystery to it (as one might assume, I suppose), even when they all had a very similar format in the way they were told (introduction, problem, overcoming the problem). Littletown itself was nearly a character of its own and I loved how certain areas of the town felt bright and cheery, while others had a gloomy, dark, and ominous feel to them. The variation really spiced things up.
One aspect that was pretty awesome was that, despite that every story is independent of the others, there was a feeling of unity between them. This was likely due to your excellent crafting of Littletown, but the tidbits and comments from the narrator definitely helped too.
Now for some of the more negative points. To me, these are somewhat nitpicky things, but with a pretty polished work like this, that's kind of all you can say sometimes. ;D
Hey, first of all, it means a lot to me that you decided to read the whole thing! I'm glad you really enjoyed it and the town/characters I crafted.
post=150684
I mentioned the format that you use for each chapter earlier, and that was kind of a downer sometimes. While it works very well if you are reading the novella in pieces, it made it hard for me to read it continuously. I ended up reading a chapter every now and again when I have some time to kill, but for those that wanted to read it in heavy sittings, the format used might kill the momentum.
I don't know if it's noticeable but my intention was that the chapters would start off fairly cheery, humorous and whimsical (Sabrina's mask; Rupert and the tree) and they would get much darker and more serious coming to the end (the lonely lantern; the cheating parents), despite the format of each being the same. I guess I was going for a kind of "fairytale" kind of vibe for each story, with the aforementioned format. And I guess I can see how that would disrupt reading in heavy sittings. I guess I never really meant it to be read as a whole, but more like in those Enid Blyton books? But if it's a big problem, I'll look into it. Once again, I appreciate the criticisms!
post=150684
Moving on, I also found some of the dialogue of the children to sometimes be a little unbelievable. This is primarily due to word choice in particular situations, and also due to how well-spoken they are at times. To provide an example from April's dialogue "Things like that you cannot plan." does not quite sound like something you would expect a kid to say. If this is intentional for stylistic or characterization reasons, I get it, although in some cases it seemed to push the boundaries.
Yeah, this was a stylistic choice. The children, though young, are mostly supposed to be portrayed as well-spoken and intelligent but each having a severe flaw (or a "sin") and still retaining their naivety. Would you mind pointing out any parts where you believe it pushed the boundaries, though?
post=150684
Finally, the narration. While I loved it, it was somewhat wordy at points and the style did not always seem consistent. I can't honestly gather a bunch of specifics for this, because I wasn't taking diligent notes as I read this (I wish I did so this could be more constructive). Really, just take this comment with a grain of salt (or whatever the phrase is), as this is mainly based on my feelings overall, without some examples to kind of point it out.
I understand what you mean but this is a flaw I recognize in some of my writing, in which I constantly switch from basic prose to very detailed "emotional" prose from time to time. Maybe it's because I haven't completely found my 'voice' yet but I'm working hard to get there.
post=150684
Ultimately, I really liked it. You are a very talented author, and if I get the chance to read some of your other works, I bet I will enjoy them just as much, if not more. I hope my comments were helpful; I would be glad to elaborate wherever necessary, if you want.
Once again, I am glad you enjoyed it and thank you for all the comments and criticisms. One question, though: which was your favourite part and which was your least favourite?
post=150740post=150690@Nessiah: Did you really read the whole thing? Can you elaborate on your comments? =)
I just read me and tom under the boardwalk, wtf did I just read? XDD
Ah that came off wrong, well I was reading the entire thing it was incredibly hilarious so when I was done I just went, WTF did I just read? It's like a Gainax feeling when you watch their shows, it's awesome but then in the end it makes you wonder, wtf did I just watch sort of thing. It's a good thing in my case! So don't worry!
I also read Littletown secrets, I really loved it :3
ariedonus
41
post=150740
Hey, first of all, it means a lot to me that you decided to read the whole thing! I'm glad you really enjoyed it and the town/characters I crafted.
I enjoyed every minute of reading it, so I should be thanking you, haha. As much as I love reading, I am rarely willing to give up my time to read, making the fact that I read your novella a good indication that I loved it.
post=150740
I don't know if it's noticeable but my intention was that the chapters would start off fairly cheery, humorous and whimsical (Sabrina's mask; Rupert and the tree) and they would get much darker and more serious coming to the end (the lonely lantern; the cheating parents), despite the format of each being the same. I guess I was going for a kind of "fairytale" kind of vibe for each story, with the aforementioned format. And I guess I can see how that would disrupt reading in heavy sittings. I guess I never really meant it to be read as a whole, but more like in those Enid Blyton books? But if it's a big problem, I'll look into it. Once again, I appreciate the criticisms!
Looking back, I can definitely see the transition of moods that you wanted to set. I likely didn't consciously notice this, because (as I mentioned) I read it in rather segmented portions. The format, although I did say that it might get tiresome for heavy reading, was still very fitting, especially for the vibe you wanted to achieve. I did feel like each chapter was a fairytale of sorts, and I don't think this is a problem worth looking into (it isn't much of a problem at all).
post=150740
Yeah, this was a stylistic choice. The children, though young, are mostly supposed to be portrayed as well-spoken and intelligent but each having a severe flaw (or a "sin") and still retaining their naivety. Would you mind pointing out any parts where you believe it pushed the boundaries, though?
Honestly, I might have been typing just for the sake of typing there. I just glanced over the novella again and nothing really stood out as pushing the boundaries, especially considering that it was an apparent stylistic choice. The parts where the narrator talks about the differences and similarities between children helped establish this, but I could see where more of these tidbits would help make that clearer.
post=150740
I understand what you mean but this is a flaw I recognize in some of my writing, in which I constantly switch from basic prose to very detailed "emotional" prose from time to time. Maybe it's because I haven't completely found my 'voice' yet but I'm working hard to get there.
Well, you are certainly a lot better off than most writers. You definitely know how to craft a story, and learning how to write in a more consistent style is always a blast, haha. I have faith that you'll figure it out. ;]
post=150740
Once again, I am glad you enjoyed it and thank you for all the comments and criticisms. One question, though: which was your favourite part and which was your least favourite?
My favorite part of the novella was probably "The Secret of the Rose in the Living Room." Just the conditions surrounding it and how the flaw was not in the person telling the secret set it apart from the others.
As far as a least favorite...it's hard for me to pick. If I HAD to pick, it was probably the "The Secret of the Starving Oak." I wasn't a huge fan of the character's flaw, but that's because I would hate to end up like that more than the other flaws, not because it wasn't interesting.
Oh, and I forgot to mention earlier that the last line of the novella is perfect. Perfect.
