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This game is the first of a series of short-stories, each focusing on different characters.
The short stories are inspired by a novel written by me, each introducing character backgrounds.

This one is about Rilris, a boy who lives in a not so developed town with his sister and his father. Cornered by the abuse of his father, unable to go to the police, he wants to look for a way out of his situation. Then he meets the new guy who just moved into town... Ray.

The game is 10-15 minutes long with two endings, both endings have two different versions.
There is not much gameplay as it's solely story driven.

For those who played Crimson Light, this was made prior to that, but chronologically its way later. I will not expand on the story of this short because of its length.
I've decided to upload it here too because I plan to collectively have all my projects here.

Feedback is appreciated!!

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  • Completed
  • atasuke10
  • RPG Maker VX Ace
  • Adventure
  • 08/21/2016 04:00 PM
  • 12/19/2022 05:57 PM
  • 05/23/2015
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Posts

Pages: 1
Frogge
I wanna marry ALL the boys!! And Donna is a meanc
18536
Crimson Light was really good, so I'll definetly be giving this a play aswell! It looks really atmospheric and the mapping seems really good, so I'm excited ^.^
author=Frogge
Crimson Light was really good, so I'll definetly be giving this a play aswell! It looks really atmospheric and the mapping seems really good, so I'm excited ^.^


Thanks a lot :D sadly it was my first ready game so the techniques may not be that good, but I hope you'Ll enjoy it anyway :)
Played this a little while ago. Finally got to write the review.
It's uh .. there's a lot you do well in it, and the situation is very heartwrenching. It was hard to play, actually. But the ending really detaches any realism and forces a false happy-ever-after conclusion .. I don't really understand that, but yeah.
It is a compact package.

Now to bunny therapy.
author=Kylaila
Played this a little while ago. Finally got to write the review.
It's uh .. there's a lot you do well in it, and the situation is very heartwrenching. It was hard to play, actually. But the ending really detaches any realism and forces a false happy-ever-after conclusion .. I don't really understand that, but yeah.
It is a compact package.

Now to bunny therapy.


I'm glad most if it was to your liking(if that's the appropriate expression xP).
I was mostly experimenting with things when I made this one. Most of their backstory was written and serves as a catalyst for some of their later behavior, so I sadly couldn't play around with the endings too much.
Enjoy the bunnies :D
There's not too much I have to say about the game as a whole, but I left a small checklist of fixes if you plan on going back to edit them out. Very minor things, and only one of them I found distracting. Ta-da!

-The lower part of the lamp in the room you start in can be walked over with no collision.
-In your sisters room, if you go on the bed and walk down or from the left hand side, it is possible to walk on that stack of black books on the desk. You can't walk across it from the front, however.
-There's a bit of a clipping issue if you walk behind the TV in the living room that covers a good chunk of the top of Rilris's hair.
-The house just above yours has a stump that you can walk over, but the other you can't. I assume they're both meant to be impossible to walk across.
-"I can't let him do this to Lea! I knew it, tt's my fault that this is happening."

For a short game, I did enjoy it, and I did like descriptive words such as throbbing to describe Ril's inner lust. Though I can't say I'm a particular fan of either ending and found them kind of underwhelming, I did enjoy the atmosphere and mapping of this little game and just wish there was more of it. More dialogue, backstory, interaction. I think with a little sharper writing you could make the short enough game as is even more memorable, or maybe even a few NPCs that might comment or hint on the state of Rilris's family. Stuff like them being questioned or even having NPCs show concern as to why Rilris's sister looks so beat on a particular day could go a long way in my opinion.

Keep making short stories like this, though. Or whatever you plan on creating down the road. I like stuff like this as uncomfortable as themes like these make me, and would enjoy playing more.

Edit: Oh wow, hadn't really read the description when I downloaded this and didn't realize this was all a series! Are your other titles set in the same universe as Crimson Mind? How many do you plan on making total?
author=Merrickrox
There's not too much I have to say about the game as a whole, but I left a small checklist of fixes if you plan on going back to edit them out. Very minor things, and only one of them I found distracting. Ta-da!

-The lower part of the lamp in the room you start in can be walked over with no collision.
-In your sisters room, if you go on the bed and walk down or from the left hand side, it is possible to walk on that stack of black books on the desk. You can't walk across it from the front, however.
-There's a bit of a clipping issue if you walk behind the TV in the living room that covers a good chunk of the top of Rilris's hair.
-The house just above yours has a stump that you can walk over, but the other you can't. I assume they're both meant to be impossible to walk across.
-"I can't let him do this to Lea! I knew it, tt's my fault that this is happening."

For a short game, I did enjoy it, and I did like descriptive words such as throbbing to describe Ril's inner lust. Though I can't say I'm a particular fan of either ending and found them kind of underwhelming, I did enjoy the atmosphere and mapping of this little game and just wish there was more of it. More dialogue, backstory, interaction. I think with a little sharper writing you could make the short enough game as is even more memorable, or maybe even a few NPCs that might comment or hint on the state of Rilris's family. Stuff like them being questioned or even having NPCs show concern as to why Rilris's sister looks so beat on a particular day could go a long way in my opinion.

Keep making short stories like this, though. Or whatever you plan on creating down the road. I like stuff like this as uncomfortable as themes like these make me, and would enjoy playing more.

Edit: Oh wow, hadn't really read the description when I downloaded this and didn't realize this was all a series! Are your other titles set in the same universe as Crimson Mind? How many do you plan on making total?


Oh my, that's quite the amount of small bugs :O
I'll fix them up today.And A... typo...? Shame.(Went over it a considerable amount of times xP)
I do have a problem with underwhelming endings sadly, trying to mitigate it for the third game but it's been a trend :( Or at least so I think. Anyway, yes Crimson Light is set is set in the same universe but way earlier in time, and is more of a horror survival, while Crimson Shift, the third and last entry in the shorts plays around 2 years earlier and goes into actual prelude to the main game that these shorts tie into as well as a story to an additional character.. They're both vastly different stories and games. I did improve a lot over making these games so it's sad for me to look back and see all the faults they have. Now that people give me feedback it's really easy for me to tell the curve I improved with, and this was not a pretty starting point xP So after I finish the third entry I'm remaking both the first and the second entry. sorry rambled on :D I'm glad you enjoyed the parts you enjoyed, thanks for the feedback, would've never found those bugs most likely xP
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